


The Crossroads of Fyrien

by Gilli_ann



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Confrontations, Crossroads, F/M, M/M, Magic Revealed, Pining, Truth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-29
Updated: 2017-09-29
Packaged: 2018-12-01 17:57:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11491653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gilli_ann/pseuds/Gilli_ann
Summary: On their way to the Castle of Fyrien, Merlin confronts Morgana about her plan to betray Arthur and Gwen. Both Merlin and Morgana speak their minds and reveal truths in a tense battle of wills that may decide Camelot's future.





	The Crossroads of Fyrien

**Author's Note:**

> A big thank you to my lovely beta, Gwyllion.
> 
> This fic is an AU version of a pivotal scene in the Merlin episode 'The Castle of Fyrien'.
> 
> Disclaimer: The characters and canon events, including the dialogue quoted in the fic's first paragraph, belong to the BBC and Shine TV. I intend no copyright infringement and make no profit.

  


_"What do you want, Merlin?"_

_"Arthur sent me. He wanted to make sure that you were OK."_

_"How very thoughtful of him."_

_"Well, he cares for you. You know, Gwen too. They're your friends, Morgana. They've always been loyal to you."_

_"Why are you telling me this?"_

_"Because I don't understand how anyone would want to hurt their friends."_

_"No, you just poison them. You'd do well, Merlin, to stay out of things that do not concern you."_

_"Oh, but they do concern me, because they're my friends too. And I'll do whatever it takes to protect them."_

_"I would expect nothing less."_

 

* * * * * 

  
She turned away from him.

Merlin raised his voice. 

"What changed, Morgana?" he asked her departing back. "You wanted to destroy Uther, and so did Morgause, I think. I could understand why. Those with magic have much to revenge. But this? Arthur is not your enemy."

Morgana threw him a disdainful look across her shoulder. "Have I said that he is?"

"Yet you do want him dead." Merlin frowned. "You and Arthur grew up together. Don't your friendship and shared history count?"

Morgana snorted. "You understand nothing. Shut up, Merlin."

Merlin drew a deep breath. He decided to gamble. "You sound just like your _brother_ ," he said with emphasis.

Morgana's eyes went wide. "How...?" The single word escaped her before she bit back the rest of the sentence. 

Merlin regarded her steadily, his gaze never flinching.

"Of course," she said after a moment. "Gaius told you."

"He did not. He keeps his promise to Uther," Merlin said, no tremor in his voice. "But I was in my room, and the door was open. I heard what you heard."

Morgana's eyes narrowed menacingly. "That you know the truth changes nothing. If you blather, no-one will believe you." 

"I know."

"Uther would kill you without hesitation for spreading such _lies_ , saving me the trouble."

"I know that, too." 

Merlin sighed. "If Uther dies, the truth dies with him. That's why you've changed your tactics, is it not?" 

Morgana tossed her braid back defiantly and stepped closer, raising her hands in a forbidding gesture. She looked every inch the warrior queen in her silver outfit— proud and relentless, with an intensity bordering on madness. Now that her parentage was out in the open, it wasn't difficult to believe that Uther was her father.

"You want the crown," Merlin stated, certain now about what had only been conjecture before. "You want to rule Camelot as Uther's true heir. But that can only happen if Uther himself declares you his daughter. The king is the only one who can let the people know, and be believed."

Morgana kept silent, observing him carefully. She did not relax her stance.

Merlin nodded, mostly to himself. "Yes, that is it. That's why you're scheming to kill Arthur. Uther will never make you his heir as long as his son lives."

Morgana shrugged, feigning an indifference that her tense body belied. 

"All these years," she ground out through clenched teeth. "All these years I have believed myself alone in the world, an orphan, cast adrift, dependent on Uther's whims. I have lived in mortal fear because of my magic."

Her green eyes flashed in agitation. 

"Uther has taken everything from me - my past is a lie, my birthright has been denied me, my gifts would have seen him burn me at the stake. It's time to turn the tables. I am the rightful heir to Camelot. I want him to admit it." 

Merlin opened his mouth to reply, but Morgana ignored him. 

She laughed, an ugly, bitter sound. "And then, once he admits it, oh believe me, _then_ I will grind him into the dust with my magic. And I will be queen, and rule over a better Camelot, where magic is cherished. If this has to come at the cost of Arthur's life, so be it. I have to consider the greater good." 

Morgana suddenly seemed taken aback by her own passionate outburst. She lowered her voice, gesturing indifference. "I wouldn't expect a half-wit peasant to understand any of this, anyway."

"There was a time when you thought peasants worth fighting and dying for. You helped save Ealdor," Merlin reminded her. "I will always be grateful for that."

"You repaid my help with poison!" Morgana lashed out. "Perhaps I should ask Cenred to raze Ealdor to the ground?"

Merlin shook his head, refusing her the pleasure of seeing his fear. "A fine ruler you will prove, if you start your reign with a massacre of innocent villagers."

"I _will_ prove a fine ruler," Morgana said. "It is my birthright."

"Do you have to achieve it with deceit and fratricide? There are too many secrets and lies in Camelot. Arthur is honest and fair, let him know the truth and decide for himself what he wants to do."

"You're clearly completely mad as well as stupid."

Merlin ignored her taunt. "You have known Arthur your whole life. You know he is honourable."

Morgana scoffed. "Arthur is his father's son. He hates and fears magic. Even if he believed that I am his sister.... I will not hide my powers, and for that alone, he would never accept me as Camelot's queen." 

"Arthur has never seen the good that magic can do, Morgana. He's only seen murder, deceit, plagues and blights visited upon the land and the people. I believe him capable of forming his own opinion." Merlin hesitated, choosing his words carefully. "He needs to be shown that there is no evil in sorcery, only in the hearts of men. Or women. He needs to see magic used for good, without ulterior motives."

"Blah, blah, blah. Why do I stand here bandying words with a village simpleton? Get out of my way, Merlin, or I'll strike you down and never regret it."

"I'm not afraid," Merlin said. "Morgause is very strong, and I'm sure she's taught you well, but you've only had a year."

"Get out of my way," Morgana said again, nearly stepping on his boots. Her eyes glowed a fierce yellow. 

"No. We're deciding the way ahead first."

Morgana smirked. "You want to convert me to meekness? Want me to return to my old soul-crushing life of nightmares by day and by night? Never. I want what's mine. And this talk is over."

Her eyes were pure gold now, and Merlin felt an invisible hand give his chest a hard push. He stumbled backwards, landing on his arse. At once his arms were pulled back, and invisible ropes twined their way around his wrists and ankles. 

He lowered his head for a moment, testing her magical bindings with his own powers. They were weak; he could break them easily. Morgana's magic had strong potential, but her command of it was still tenuous. 

The woods were quiet. Every tree cast a long shadow across the forest floor. The sun was sinking. Merlin hoped that Arthur would forget the time while enjoying himself with Gwen. The last thing he needed was Arthur discovering them in the middle of this quarrel. 

He remained sitting on the ground, looking up at Morgana. 

She was grinning down at him. "There's nothing more to say. I win. Wouldn't you agree?"

"I'm asking you to be honest with Arthur, and to let him decide what he wants to do about the succession," Merlin persisted. "What have you got to lose from telling Arthur the truth? If he thinks you and your allies are a threat to Camelot, he will fight the lot of you. But out here he's alone with only Gwen and me at his side, - while you have Morgause's magic, and Cenred and his armies at your beck and call, I assume. Surely you believe you'll win, whatever he decides."

Morgana was silent. She studied him, the initial rage in her face giving way to a quizzical expression. 

"Are you aware that you dropped your simpleton manner quite a while back there?" she eventually asked. "I think I'm seeing the real you, Merlin. How do you manage to foil my plans every time? Why aren't you afraid of me? How did you escape Morgause's magical chains?"

Merlin didn't reply. 

Morgana pressed on. "Any ordinary servant would have been dead twenty times over. You're a fine one, telling me to be honest. What is _your_ secret?"

When Merlin still didn't respond, she sneered, and unintentionally landed a punch straight to his gut. "Well, I'm sure you're keeping Arthur in the dark, too."

The truth hurt. Merlin instinctively protected himself with his usual dopey smile, though he couldn't make it reach his eyes. "I have no secrets, I'm an open book!" 

"Says the man who looked me in the face and tricked me into drinking poison."

Merlin sighed. He dropped the pretense. "I didn't want to. It haunts me to this day. But Morgause had tied the knights of Medhir to you. They could not die as long as you lived. Did she tell you that? I think not."

Morgana blanched. After a moment, all she said was, "Do not slander Morgause to my face."

Merlin looked up at her, studying her beautiful face and her cruel mien with sadness in his heart. 

Whatever Morgana had become, whatever was in her heart now, in many ways she was his creation. His actions, and his failure to act, had shaped the woman in front of him. He had withheld support and knowledge from her when she discovered her magic. He had seen her desperation and her fear, had understood it like no one else could, and still had kept silent. He had killed her. He had brought her back to life when she stood at death's very door. He had held her life in his hands twice. And he harboured no illusion about it; he would kill her again if he had to. 

Kilgharrah kept insisting that Morgana had to die. When ordered to save her, the great dragon had warned Merlin that the evil that would follow would be Merlin's doing, and his alone. Now, to his surprise, Merlin found that there was a strange freedom in this dire foretelling. Fate had already had its say, had warned him off, and now the rest was up to him. 

The only thing he'd never tried, was to be completely honest with her. 

The thought had no sooner crossed his mind when he felt doubt and caution reasserting themselves. If he told her the truth, would he not be handing her the most powerful weapon yet? 

Everything he'd done, he'd done for Arthur. That would never change. Arthur was the sun in his sky, his hope for a brighter, better future for himself, for the people, for every magic user, for Albion. There was nothing Merlin wouldn't do to see Arthur fulfil his destiny. He would never allow Morgana to stand in his way, no matter what she did, no matter what she knew, no matter how many secrets she unlocked. 

He had to believe he was stronger than Arthur's enemies. And he could not let this final tiny chance to reach Morgana slip away.

The time had come for fates to be tested and re-shaped. 

The time had come to see, for once, where truth would take them. 

Merlin made Morgana's magical ropes dissolve, barely exerting his magic, and rose nimbly to his feet. 

Morgana's eyes narrowed. Her body tensed. "How did you do that?"

Merlin smiled, certain of the way ahead. 

"Someone very powerful once prophesied that you are the darkness to my light," he told her. "But I think that someone was wrong. I think there is darkness and light in the both of us. And I want the light to win."

Morgana shook her head, taking a step back. "What is this?"

"Isn't it obvious? I was born of magic," Merlin said. He felt a rush of elation at his own words, finally revealing the truth that he'd hidden for so long, taking that first risky step out of the shadows. 

He looked her straight in the eye and let his magic rise to the surface, glowing in his eyes, humming in the air. Countless bright flames danced around the two of them, forming circles and ancient symbols.

Morgana turned deadly pale. She stood her ground, but her lips trembled.

Merlin let the flames die, putting the lid on his magic. He waited. 

Once the many lights were gone, he realized how dark it was under the cover of the trees. 

At long last, Morgana spoke. "Am I right in thinking that Arthur doesn't know?"

"Yes."

"So if I go to tell him right now..."

"We can go to him and accuse each other of sorcery and of murder, Morgana. What would that bring? He trusts us both. He'll likely refuse to believe any of it, and just be confused."

She glared at him. Her eyes and her bright mail glimmered dully in the dusk.

"Now, if you were to tell Uther about me, though... _He'd_ believe you," Merlin pointed out. "He believes all such accusations. How many innocents have died because of his hatred of magic? Isn't that why you have lived in fear, why I have had to hide? Isn't that what we both want to change?"

Morgana bit her lip, sizing him up. Merlin wondered what she saw now that the truth had been revealed. Did he look any different?

"How strong are you?" she asked at last. 

He shrugged. "Strong enough. Stronger than Morgause, if that's what you're asking. And I have powerful allies."

"Who?"

For a moment Merlin considered calling Kilgharrah. The mere thought of the dragon facing Morgana and raging at her still being alive, contemptuously calling her a witch and worse - No. He shuddered and thought better of it.

"Believe me, or don't. Unless I trust us to be on the same side in this, there are things I won't reveal."

He stepped closer, so he could see her face clearly in the gloom. "What I want is a Camelot where magic is accepted. A united Albion, strong and fair, where magic is used for good and everyone can live in peace."

Morgana was still processing his revelation. "You had magic all along, and yet you never told me, never helped me!" 

Merlin sighed. Maybe they would get no further than this. 

"There are actions I regret, but I cannot say for certain that I would have done anything differently. I have had to compromise and bide my time. So have you. And we've both had to hide in the shadow of Uther's laws and the fear of his pyres." 

Merlin looked up. Night was falling. Clouds had rolled in from the sea. It would be a night without stars. He wondered if Morgause was nearby, waiting to talk to her sister in secret.

Suddenly he felt very tired. "We must get back to camp, Morgana. Maybe all this was another mistake that I'll soon learn to rue. Everything I've done has been to protect Arthur and to keep him safe until the day he brings true greatness to Camelot and welcomes the free practice of magic. He's seen so many sorcerers attacking, using dark magic, bent on destruction. I wanted to change his view of us before he took the throne, and prove to him beyond doubt that magic can be a force for good."

He paused, exhausted. 

Morgana was silent, observing him intently.

"If that is truly what you wish too, we should co-operate. We should be allies, not enemies," Merlin concluded. 

"You seem to forget that Arthur is not the future ruler of Camelot anymore," Morgana told him coldly.

Merlin shook his head. "I believe Arthur is the destined king of all Albion, the prophesied Once and Future King. I wish you would help him, not oppose him."

Morgana laughed bitterly. "Step aside, woman, hold your tongue and let the menfolk rule. They're ever so much better at it," she scoffed. "That is what every princess and every high priestess has been told at every turn since long before Uther became king. And now you're telling me the same."

"No, it's not. That's not my point," Merlin insisted. He struggled to find the right words, to communicate his confusing jumble of thoughts. 

"You know Arthur puts Camelot and her people above all else. Camelot's well-being will guide his actions, even in this. It should guide yours, too. If he learns the truth about you - all of it, mind you - and accepts you as the rightful heir to Camelot's throne, then so will I," Merlin said. "Talk to him. Show your brother that much respect. He cannot make a decision when he doesn't know there's one to make."

Morgana nodded once, a terse gesture that acknowledged his plea without promising anything. She arched an eyebrow at him speculatively.

"Me?" Merlin drew a breath. "Yes, I will always be loyal to Arthur. If you continue trying to harm him, I will fight you. I will be right by his side every step of the way. Do not think that's a war you can win."

His shoulders slumped. Merlin was too used to living in the shadows and keeping silent, the real him going unseen and unheard. Talking this much truth, being honest, coming clean, when lives and a kingdom were at stake - it had worn him out. 

And likely there would be no gain from doing so. Morgana still had that frozen, haughty expression, hatred and contempt having left a permanent mark where once there was kindness and compassion. 

He had been too late. It had all been in vain.

"You love him," Morgana said. "Why haven't I realized that until now? The more you talk about him, the clearer it becomes. Arthur holds your heart."

Merlin frowned. His innermost secrets were his own. He refused to bring them out in the open for Morgana to gloat at them.

"I remember the Morgana who came to Ealdor. She cared deeply for Arthur and Gwen, and for the people of Camelot," Merlin instead told her, voice low. "That Morgana had spirit and courage and sharp edges, but she wasn't mean. She wasn't evil. Only you know whether she is gone for good." 

He turned around, gesturing at the sticks of wood she had dumped at his feet. That seemed like an eternity ago.

Quickly collecting the firewood with his magic, he wearily retraced his steps back to camp. He could hear Morgana's light footfalls as she followed close behind. 

Neither of them spoke a word.

At the campsite, Arthur and Gwen sat close together, their heads nearly touching, blond and dark. 

Their obvious intimacy pinched Merlin's already-bruised heart. 

"Here's firewood!" he called out cheerily. "I'm hungry!"

Arthur jumped to his feet, looking sheepish. 

"There you are! It gets dark very fast here. Gwen and I were worried for you, Merlin. We discussed a rescue mission, but then we realized that Morgana would be there to keep you safe."

Morgana pulled her face into a smile that looked more like a grimace.

Their evening meal was a lopsided affair. Arthur was cheerful and talkative, Gwen was quiet but happy, Morgana seemed distracted and responded mostly in monosyllables, and Merlin was silent. As soon as he could, he excused himself to go look after the horses, and to prepare the camp for the night. 

"I will take the first watch," he told Arthur.

Wrapping a blanket around himself, Merlin sat down with his back to a birch-tree, watching the three others settling down for the night by the dying campfire. 

Very soon everything was quiet, except for the distant calls of hunting night-birds, and the occasional soft nicker from one of the horses. 

If Morgana had planned to sneak off to meet up with Morgause, she made no attempt now that Merlin was watching. Her prone shape looked restful under the blanket, but inbetween, a small impatient movement gave her away. She got no more sleep than Merlin that night.

They all rose as the sun's first light washed over the camp, sharing a brief meal before setting out on the next leg of the journey.

Merlin couldn't read Morgana. She barely spoke, and had a distracted air about her. Both of them avoided meeting the other's eyes.

The four of them rode at a brisk pace along the little-used road that wound its way through a gently rolling landscape, copses of trees alternating with open areas strewn with boulders. They met no people along the way. The countryside seemed deserted.

Around noon on the final day, they could smell a salt tang in the air. They were approaching the sea, and the ancient castle at the seashore.

In the distance, they could see a smaller road intersecting the one they were following. At the crossroads, Arthur called a halt. He looked ahead, then studied the road going left. 

Merlin was tense. It couldn't be long now until Morgause's trap was sprung. On the horse in front of him, Morgana's rigid back gave nothing away.

"If we continue on the main road, we'll reach the castle gate," Arthur explained. "But the one to the left must be the one that leads to the cliffs and the caves under the castle, with the secret tunnel opening where we will enter. Do you hear the sound of the waves?"

He nudged his horse forward, gesturing for the others to follow. "Let's hurry. Don't worry, Gwen. Elyan will soon be a free man." 

Morgana hadn't spoken for hours. Now she righted herself in the saddle and held her horse back. Her armour, shimmering in the noontime sun, made her a vision of light.

"No," she said. "Stop."

After a brief hesitation, she added, loudly and clearly; "It's a trap, Arthur."


End file.
